Get Up!

I was crazy enough to register to run in the Peachtree this year. Not real sure what I was thinking. I guess I've always wanted to say that I've done it and with the thoughts of my mortality kind of thrust in my face lately, I figured there was no time like the present. It's not that I mind running (or I guess jogging is a better term), it's that I do it from the comfort of my own home on a treadmill, with a built-in fan and ESPN on the TV in front of me. And I usually only trudge along for 2 miles at a time, two or three times a week. But now I have this event looming in the future. 6.2 miles of hot, humid, crowded and hilly terrain. And someone will actually keep up with how long it takes me. And I'm sure people will ask me as well. So with this in mind, I have been preparing myself for a more advanced running workout. I have been trying to increase my distance just to get my stamina up. But an odd thing started happening to me last week. All of my joints started to ache. And I don't mean a little. I mean A LOT. It started with my knees, both of them. Next my hands and fingers got really sore and stiff. They were swollen and I had trouble getting my wedding ring on and off my finger. Then the pain moved to my shoulder sockets and my hips. What the hell was happening to me? I felt as if I had aged thirty years in one week. Then the paranoia set in. Was this a complication from the cancer? Was it really spreading to all of my bones just like they said it could? Was I having a reaction to the thyroid medicine I was taking? Was it the barometric pressure from the oncoming storm moving across the country? I woke up every morning like I had just had my butt whipped and I was so tired. I wasn't resting well because all of my joints were killing me and I tossed and turned all night. The LAST thing I wanted to do in the mornings was get up at 5:00 am and get on that stupid treadmill. Then Friday morning when the alarm had gone off half a dozen times I finally told myself, "GET UP!!!" And I did. And I managed to get 2 miles in on the treadmill before I had to get ready for work. And It hurt. But I realized that if I continue to talk myself out of running and I keep making excuses to not get up, that I'll just make it a habit of not getting up and pretty soon I would just give up. And then the Peachtree would be upon me and I would not have trained and I would probably just not go and waste a perfectly good opportunity to accomplish a goal of mine that I've had for a long time. And what a flippin' waste that would be. So as I drove to work later that day with my knees and hips and shoulders and fingers aching like I was a hundred years old, I got to thinking about God again. Which is something I've been doing a lot more lately. My relationship with God is so very much like what I have been going through lately. We all have this date with destiny where we go and meet our maker and we stand before Him. And along the way God begs us to talk to Him, to know Him, to walk with Him, to pray to Him, and to be in a relationship with Him. And throughout my life, it has seemed that every time I sign up to get ready to get close to Him, something gets in the way. The aches and pains of life get in the way and make me tired and sore and lazy. I get frustrated with missed opportunities, mad about things that didn't go my way and scared about sicknesses that come out of nowhere. And all of these things are tools of the devil that he uses to keep us from that sweet, sweet relationship that we strive to have with God and His son Jesus. And I realized that instead of yelling at myself to "GET UP!" that I actually have to tell my self to "GET DOWN!" Get down on my knees and lay all my worries, fears, and failures at the feet of my God. Tell God what He already knows about me but what He so desperately wants to hear from me personally. It's kind of like what my kids eat at school for lunch each day. I ask them everyday what they had for lunch. Why? I don't care at all what they ate. And for that matter, I could just as easily look on the monthly school lunch calendar that is posted in our kitchen and see what they ate that day. But there is something so sweet to hear that my little boy chose to eat Rib-a-que, as he calls it, and to laugh with him and hear Haley say how gross it is. And I tell Britton that I love it too, and that I would have picked Rib-a-que to eat if I were there. And we talk and share a moment about absolutely nothing important in life. And I love it. God is the same way. He wants me to get down on my knees and tell him about the most mundane aspects of my life. But He also wants to hear the things that are really on my mind and are bothering me. I need to tell Him that I'm worried that the cancer has spread all over my body, even though I know it's not true. I need to tell him that I need His gift of wisdom at work and that I'm afraid of failing the people that depend on me. I need to tell Him I am thankful for all of the wonderful people in my life that are praying for me and my family and that their encouragement has meant so much to me. I need to tell Him that I simply need Him. So, as the Peachtree quickly approaches I keep running. And I keep telling myself to "Get up." And as life continues to come at me with all its surprises, I keep praying. And I keep telling myself when things are scary, or strange or even good, to "Get down" and talk to God.